For the Love of Daisies

On January 22 my 97 year old grandmother passed away.  She was an amazing woman.  My grandpa passed away 17 years ago and she lived on her own until 4 months before her death.  She beat cancer twice once in the 1950's when almost no one beat cancer.  She worked hard and preserved through a difficult life.  We always jokingly said that we come from a line of "sturdy" women.  I love her so much and miss her every day!  Today, I was cleaning out one of the flower arrangements from her funeral.  We bought a beautiful spray of white roses, white lilies, blue delphinium and daisies.  After a week, I cleaned out the roses and some of the delphinium and this week I cleaned out the lilies and the rest of the delphinium, but the daisies are all still going strong.  They are so beautiful and bright and sturdy!  As I cleaned the flowers, I realized that my grandmother was a daisy - beautiful and sturdy.  She was strong and beautiful no matter the circumstances and while I may not be as beautiful as she was I too am a sturdy girl.  It took me a while to be grateful to be a "sturdy" girl, but once I started having, raising and schooling my children I was very grateful to be like my grandma.  I have seen a lot of women start homeschooling with beautiful plans and ideas, but they stopped after only a short time.  Muck like the roses and the lilies they browned and gave up quickly.  I also know many women who are daisies.  They homeschool in a bright and beautiful but not flashy way.  And most important they hang on for the long haul.  For a good portion of my life I wanted to be a rose, someone others thought was beautiful and elegant and delicate.  Now after 26 years of marriage, 4 kids and 12 years of homeschooling I am really happy to be a daisy.  Daisies have always been my favorite flowers and now I love them even more!  Here's to you grandma and all the daisies in my life!

Why I am a Mean Mommy!

It is interesting to me that so often when people find out that I homeschool one of the first things they say is that they couldn't spend all day with their children.  They hate for summer to come and can't wait for September when the kids go back to school.  That is so sad to me.  I waited quite a while for three of my four children and I was so grateful for each of them, yet that wasn't really enough for me.  I really wanted to enjoy being with my children.  I wanted to like them not just love them.  I was raised by old-fashioned parents who believed in disciplining so that their children would never be offensive to other people and so they would enjoy us.  Today, they honestly enjoy being with all of us.  We sit around a table eating and laughing until our sides hurt and we all love it.  That is where the mean mommy comes in.  So many people think I am a mean mom because I discipline my children.  I set clear limits well inside the bounds of my own sanity and then I consistently enforce the limits.  I teach table manners and require my kids to use them.  I don't let my kids interrupt conversations adult or otherwise and we practice conversation skills at the dinner table.  My children are interesting, thoughtful people who actually like to be with their parents.  They will come and hang out on our bed and talk for hours.  They hang around the dinner table and talk about things going on in their lives and in the world.  Other people enjoy my children and often comment about how nice they are.  When did it become more important to be friends with our kids, than it is to be their parents?   When did our culture decide that if you discipline that you are mean, impatient and unkind?  It seems to me the truly unkind thing is not to teach them.  The happiest children I know come from homes where mom and dad are on the same page and discipline consistently.  So here's to mean moms (and dads) everywhere!  I hope you enjoy your children even more in the New Year!