Why I am a Mean Mommy!

It is interesting to me that so often when people find out that I homeschool one of the first things they say is that they couldn't spend all day with their children.  They hate for summer to come and can't wait for September when the kids go back to school.  That is so sad to me.  I waited quite a while for three of my four children and I was so grateful for each of them, yet that wasn't really enough for me.  I really wanted to enjoy being with my children.  I wanted to like them not just love them.  I was raised by old-fashioned parents who believed in disciplining so that their children would never be offensive to other people and so they would enjoy us.  Today, they honestly enjoy being with all of us.  We sit around a table eating and laughing until our sides hurt and we all love it.  That is where the mean mommy comes in.  So many people think I am a mean mom because I discipline my children.  I set clear limits well inside the bounds of my own sanity and then I consistently enforce the limits.  I teach table manners and require my kids to use them.  I don't let my kids interrupt conversations adult or otherwise and we practice conversation skills at the dinner table.  My children are interesting, thoughtful people who actually like to be with their parents.  They will come and hang out on our bed and talk for hours.  They hang around the dinner table and talk about things going on in their lives and in the world.  Other people enjoy my children and often comment about how nice they are.  When did it become more important to be friends with our kids, than it is to be their parents?   When did our culture decide that if you discipline that you are mean, impatient and unkind?  It seems to me the truly unkind thing is not to teach them.  The happiest children I know come from homes where mom and dad are on the same page and discipline consistently.  So here's to mean moms (and dads) everywhere!  I hope you enjoy your children even more in the New Year!

Homeschoolers Knew it all Along!

I saw this article today on Facebook and really enjoyed it.  While I often think that people are making a huge stretch to constantly think that what works in a small Scandinavian country will work in a big and diverse one, I did agree with this teacher.  Breaks are really good for both parent and child and moving children to learning independence is vital in their journey to adulthood.  As a homeschool mom none of this is new to me.  Teaching and learning are a marathon not a sprint and working against children and not with them will never help them master anything and causes frustration for both parent and child.

http://www.edweek.org/tm/articles/2013/11/26/ctq_walker.html?tkn=UZNF8EtKeWip7I2g5o6YlJQGE7BFNCYJMV8m&cmp=ENL-TU-NEWS1

Clean Up Days

I always take Thanksgiving week off!  I need a couple of catch up days going into the holiday season so I take the days before Thanksgiving and do some deep cleaning.  It seems to be an almost given that home schooling homes are not messy per se, but definitely not immaculate.  I think this was the hardest thing for me as I started home schooling.  When my oldest children were in school, I would send them off to school on Monday morning and clean all day.  Then I would sit down with a cold drink, some handwork and a TV show before they got home just to enjoy the clean house.  I have to say I really miss that!  The boys and I keep the house functioning, but the mess builds up as deep cleaning goes undone.  So today, I started in Joshua's room, he's the youngest and 11 and a pack rat!  Are you getting a picture?  I probably should have taken a picture.  I have company coming for Thanksgiving and some of their children are sleeping in there so we had to deep clean.  AAGGGHH!  Joshua and I spent 6 hours in there cleaning and dusting and getting rid of some of the accumulated trash - I mean treasures!  We took a big black trash bag full out of his room and it looks amazing now.  It won't last long though as his imagination starts to work to fill the space we just created, but it sure feels good today to have his room REALLY clean for a couple of hours.  Maybe, I should go in there with a cold drink, some handwork and a movie! :)

Change is Hard

I have been home schooling for 12 years.  Things change every year and you would think that I would be used to that by now.  That small changes wouldn't throw me for a loop anymore.  Yesterday Joshua, my youngest, looked over at the table where Matthew (#3) used to work and wanted to know if he could move over there.  Matthew has been working in the dining room for over a year now because it is quieter down there and he can spread out.  So yesterday, Joshua moved to the other table and is no longer sitting beside me everyday for school.  He has sat beside me everyday for that last 7 years!  It is such a little thing so why have I been near to tears for two days.  Because he is growing up!  Because I only have one more year with Matthew and he too will be off to college.  Where have all the years gone?  When I had four children under 12 and was learning to homeschool, I thought this day would never come and if it did I would have a party.  Now, as my children grow up and continue their lives mostly outside of my home I find myself teary instead of happy, melancholy instead of exhilarated.  These last 12 years have been such a gift from a loving Father that I have not the words to thank Him.  I thought I was doing this great service for my children when in fact it has been so much joy for me.  I know they must grow up.  It is the way of things, but I am grateful for endless days together.  I am grateful for meals and books shared for loving memories and all the blessings that have filled my home all because I chose to bring my children home and to enjoy them to the very fullest every single day.

Park Day

Yesterday was park day!  It was so nice to get out in the sunshine and forget for an hour.  Forget about the messy house (after five days of school the house looks like a tornado blew through -oh my!), the grading still to be done and the million other things on my very long list.  It was nice to visit with amazing women who also have a messy house, but who love their kids and are doing their best.  I love watching kids playing and running around and organizing games amongst themselves.  I have been home schooling for 12 years and my youngest is the only one who regularly goes to park day anymore.  I am by far the oldest mom there and yet even when I go thinking that I will try to be a support and a help to the other mothers I find myself getting back in the car with a smile on my face.  I've laughed and talked and been lifted and I just feel better.  So here is a plea to all home school moms everywhere.  Get out and join with other like minded moms.  They need you and you need them.  Park days are wonderful and today I am grateful for the amazing women I am privileged to know!

A Glimpse into our World

So it is cold here in beautiful NC!  OK everyone who lives in cold climates it is cold for the South :)  It was 30 degrees when we woke up this morning and my husband turns the heat way down at night so when the boys started their school day today they piled up in front of the heat vents with blankets.  Please note that they are both still wearing shorts.  Somehow, I have not gotten the message across that when it is cold you actually need warm clothes!  They are actually moving, but slowly today.  Is it possible that when you live in the South you turn into part reptile?

Monday Mornings

Does anyone else have a hard time getting started on Monday mornings?  I have tried every system known and nothing seems to stem the Monday morning crazies.  We have tried planning the week on Friday so we have time to get to the library.  We have tried and been mostly successful with planning the week on Sunday, but there still seems to be residual weekend stuff spilling into Monday mornings.  And then there are the Sundays that are too busy to plan school for the next week and we have to do it on Monday morning.  Aaaaggghhh!  This is one of those weeks and I feel like a loony person.  Somehow when I start the week behind, I never feel on top of things.  Thank heavens the weather is nice and the trees are full of color here in beautiful NC.  Maybe that is why God made the seasons, so that when we are dying on a Monday morning in the fall we can look out the window and the beauty just takes our breath away.  Then when we feel like we can't be cooped up with kids another week spring comes and everyone heads outside without coats and a miracle happens.  Maybe, we'll go out and play in the leaves and watch for a miracle!! :)